You were born four weeks early

On your uncle’s birthday

We hadn’t even picked a name for you

I wasn’t ready

And yet

I was so ready to hold you

Grandma came to the hospital

To watch you enter the world

The picture of the two of you together

Still makes me happy

Life seemed simple

When I stared at your perfect face

The name Sebastian

Begged to be chosen

Such a big name

For a tiny boy

The nurse said

Sebastian sounds like the name of someone bound to do important things

On the first day of your life

As with every day prior to your arrival

My biggest wish for you

Was health

Because your three year old brother already had so many medical complications

I didn’t have specific dreams for you

Benjamin taught me

How little I could control

On and off as you grew

Small things worried me

You didn’t always react when I called you

Perhaps I chose the wrong name

When the doctor diagnosed you with autism

I feared for your future

I wished I had wished for more than good health

So I started wishing

For you to speak

To listen

To understand

You did all those things

Not when or how I wanted

But you did

Today you are 16 years old

You wished for three dvd’s

Three books

To see a movie with a friend

And a trip to your favorite diner for a meal and a slice of apple pie

Pretty simple list

Yesterday I watched your teammates gather to sing happy birthday to you

Your smile assured me

That moment was more important to you

Than the presents

That moment was important to me too

Autism hasn’t and won’t

Keep you from finding your place in this world

The name Sebastian suits you very well

You have already done important things

I look forward to watching all you continue to do

Happy Birthday

Love

Mom